Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Inter Racial Divorce

My wife and I have known an inter racial couple for many years.

Lets call them Don and Leung.

Don, the husband is of anglo heritage, is a professional and a high income earner. This was his second marriage.

He married Leung, a Chinese woman who was close to 20 years his junior. She did not work and apparently attended some college course.

Leung is attractive and very stylish, but I have always felt uncomfortable around her.

They met through some dating service that arranged get togethers between anglo men and chinese women.

When they decided to get married, they flew to China to get approval from Leung's father. Her father asked to see proof of Don's high salary, and only then gave his approval for the marriage to proceed. This emphasis on money was also very much a part of Leung's views on life. Everything revolved around money, and she made it clear that she would not have married Don if he did not make such a high salary.

After the honeymoon period, serious cracks started to appear in this marriage.

Firstly, Leung objected to Don financially supporting his two daughters from his previous marriage. She complained about this bitterly.

Secondly, she refused to allow Don to even see his daughters. Don eventually resorted to secret meetings with his daughters.

Not really what marriage is supposed to be like, is it?

Well, tensions grew in the household, and one day when Leung realised that Don had seen his daughters the previous day, she took a knife from the kitchen and lunged at him.

He had a large cut on his torso.

To top it off, she immediately called the police and alleged that he attempted to hit her.

The end result was that Don was evicted from his house. This was the house that he paid for exclusively, including all the household furniture, give that Leung only owned a car at the time.

This couple has now divorced.

As events unfolded, Leung claimed the bank account of the couple (circa $80,000), and fought bitterly over the house.

She eventually agreed to a 50% spilt on the value of the house, but kept all the furniture and the bank account. Don simply couldn't fight this any longer, and so agreed.

Interestingly, one week after separation, a new man moved in with Leung. He too was an older anglo male. They too are now separated and in legal conflict as well.

When I first met Leung, both Ms B and I agreed that she was a leech, a gold digger. We both approached Don separately and asked him to think through his marriage plans carefully, because leung was making some comments not in keeping with someone who was genuinely in love.

Don listened to know one, but simply wanted to tell us how he could't stop thinking about his lovely Leung.

I mention this because there seems to be a high divorce rate amongst inter racial couples in Australia, especially amongst the Anglo-Chinese variety.

And Don and Leung's situation is mild given what I have recently heard about another couple.

...more on that next.


Anonymous said...

I am going through a divorce. I married a Chinese woman about 1 year ago. I am 68 years old and she 42.

I have never experienced the level of malice than I am now experiencing from my wife.

My barrister told me that in his experience, Chinese women are the worst of the worst.

They have a belief that what is their sis theirs, and what is yours is theirs too.

Anonymous said...

Chinese women are the most aggressive and demanding of all races. They seek out easy going westerners and then take advantage of them.

It took me the loss of my house to work out that all she wanted from me was my money.

I should have realised. I was 30 years older than her. She was young and pretty. It seemed too good to be true..and it was.

Anonymous said...

Just looking at the age differences between the ex-couples, was it really any surprise how the outcomes turned out? Seriously any woman in her prime (esp. young and pretty) who would marry a man old enough to be her father is usually doing it primarily for money and security first and foremost. It's quite naive to think otherwise, not to mention racist to use Chinese women as scapegoats when such problems arise more often than not with all women willing to marry old men, i.e the infamous Anna Nicole Smith anyone?
Maybe old men just shouldn't try to get with girls 20+ yrs younger? Other wise maybe they have no one to blame but themselves for nearly loosing it all.
Seriously it's a sick sight to see these fat old men with their young pretty girls hanging on. Nothing brings to mind that 'Lolita' book better.

Faye said...

I find this article to be somewhat biased in its viewpoint.
And of course the comments.

First of all, no amount of self-deluding can take away the fact that this "relationship" was very obviously a transaction.

An older man offering security and money (possibly permanent residency, if she isn't one) to a much younger woman who seeks an easy life at the expense of her dignity and youth.

Of course, there are cases where an older man and younger woman fall in love, but this is quite rare.

When you marry a woman who sees your cash and latches on to you despite being attractive and most times, intelligent enough to study and forge a career on her own, you'd have to be delusional to think that a young, reasonably attractive woman would want a sagging, aging, most of the time bitter - sacks of flesh as compared to many younger, more eligible and suitable specimens out there.

Its fairly obvious the older man would wave status, money and benefits as a drawing point to a much younger gold digging woman who would do the trade.

If it doesn't work out - both are at fault.
You cannot expect the woman to be the submissive 'Asian' mother/wife/whore dream combination when she had most likely aimed directly for the man in a predatory move to advance her aspirations for an easy life.
You also cannot expect the man expecting a young, naive and submissive wife to accept that his wife is actually a thinking, calculative individual who played along in the beginning but now having 'bagged' the prize - reveals her normal personality.

Hence the two individuals - usually the male being the delusional one to think his wife actually loves him - cannot reach a compromise and separate.

Many a time this male being older tends to have more emotional baggage and is the one who actually abuses the woman when his disappointment peaks having being faced with reality.
You'd have the question the ability of a man to be a father and husband if he is old, is a divorcee and has to resort to seeking transactional relationships to fulfil his needs.
Especially since he seeks such a relationship to fulfil on HIS selfish needs - i.e. seeks a beautiful, young woman instead of finding someone more reasonably within his league.

Most women are very lenient in the looks department when it comes to men they will marry as for us women it is a man's qualities which win us over - his honour, his respect, his character traits, etc, not so much his looks.

So if a man by this time cannot find a woman it is quite obviously something wrong with him.

I see nothing wrong with these women doing such malicious acts when it is consequence of a man marrying a woman he hardly knows only to seek access to her youth and body.
Obviously such a woman cannot be an honest, decent woman.

Worst still are the men who seek desperate women from 3rd world countries to marry them and expect their wife 'love' him. (i.e. Thailand, etc)

It makes no difference when you bring the race issue into play as every race has men and women of this sort.

If you made your bed, you better well lie in it.

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